Be Honest About Email Skills
January 28th, 2012Email has rapidly become the default channel of communication in many of our professional and personal relationships. This means that individuals who have email addresses are expected to check them regularly and respond in a timely fashion to messages they have received. Though expectations about how fast a response should be sent likely vary by individual, message, and context, the expectation remains: respond, if you have received.
Despite email’s prevalence, however, great differences exist in just how well individuals manage their email accounts. Some communicators handle email with ease, using set methods to deal with email in a timely manner and keep their inbox sorted to avoid getting overwhelmed. But other communicators seem to struggle with the volume of email they receive; they don’t respond for extended periods of time (if at all), fail to internalize key information transmitted over email, and let many emails go unread. Rather than demonize these people for their poor email skills, it is better that we let these people know: Be honest about your email skills.
Information transmitted over email has many advantages. It is easy to send, can contain a lot of textual information thanks to its long form, and can be used to transmit files by attaching them to the message. But email with an unreliable communication partner has overwhelming disadvantages, mainly stemming from the lack of confirmation that the partner has actually read and understood the message. For poor emailers, this fact can lead to many failed interactions. The sender has the expectation that the receiver will pay attention to the message. The receiver who is bad at email, however, cannot be trusted to live up to the those expectations.
Rather than changing our expectations globally (“you can’t trust anyone to read an email!”) or asking the poor emailers to change (“read my emails or we’re done!”), the best thing for the email-inept is to open up about their email use patterns. For example, if a person checks their email infrequently, they should simply admit this. If a person doesn’t like to respond to emails (for whatever reason), then let the sender know. If a person can’t handle the volume of emails, then figure out some other way to communicate with people.
All these solutions would be much more welcome than the delusional receiver who thinks he can handle email but repeatedly fails to see important messages and reply in a timely manner: the job candidate who doesn’t reply to an interview request for several days, the manager who tells employees to email her but never recalls the emails sent when meeting about them, the co-worker who only responds to questions asked in one out of every three emails. For all these people, the task is to recognize their lack of email skills and let people know: I just can’t get the hang of email.
There is likely to be a measure of shame associated with such an admission. After all, the concept of email is not particularly challenging. But by admitting such failure, perhaps the email-inept will work harder to figure out a solution that works for them. If email is overwhelming, then set up a mail application for reading and replying to email. Use Microsoft’s Outlook or Apple’s Mail to construct rules and filters that steer emails into appropriate folders. Put together a pattern of use that makes reading and responding to emails its own task, to be dealt with several times throughout the day. Don’t try to read email on the fly, for example on a smartphone or tablet, if this means that the messages will get lost when switching between devices. And finally, stop sending emails asking for information if the response is likely to get lost or missed.
Whether or not the unskilled email user improves, communication can improve through honesty. When a person admits that he can’t manage his email, or that email is a bad way to contact him, or whatever, senders can make better choices. Of course, senders themselves may be inept at other channels. There are people who never return missed calls, even if a voicemail message is left; who don’t answer their phone, ever; who are constantly distracted or tuned-out when meeting face-to-face; or who always seem to be dodging any attempts at communication. If everyone can be honest about the best way to communicate with them – email, phone, text, face-to-face, etc. – then communication can flourish. Without that self-awareness, another missed email message is bound to drive us skilled emailers to madness.
